I learned something new a while back.
It is entirely possible to take on a task that is too difficult and when doing so, it is important to recognize that the outcome may not be ideal.
In fact, sometimes it is wise to give up!
How often have we heard, ”No one likes a quitter!” or “Keep trying! You can do it!”
You know what? It is not always true.
In my latest experience, I decided to move some very heavy furniture. Not a good plan. Turned out to be far more challenging than I expected. I did get it done – but the toll it took on me wasn’t pleasant.
I suffered with neck pain for several days. Over the counter pain relievers helped a bit, but I regretted my actions.
It is time to accept that aging can mean some things that I could do once are no longer wise.
In the case of a marriage gone bad, years ago, I stubbornly tried to stay in the relationship, but it was at the expense of my mental well being.
I had to quit.
I was a smoker. In that instance, it was a good thing to be a Quitter. I did succeed.
Rewarded for Existence?
When I hear that all the participants in some competition are handed a trophy, ”because they took part, even though they didn’t win” – well, that just seems wrong.
The idea that children, or anyone, for that matter, should be rewarded for just ”existing” – how did that become a thing?
I think that learning to cope with failure, with not being ”first”, with not be ”equal” to everyone else in a peer group is a fundamental part of becoming and of being a person.
Limitations – We All Have Them
As I age, I am learning to cope with the changes that come.
When parents tell their offspring that ”you can be anything you want to be in life!” – is that not a lie and a great disservice to a child?
To be realistic, no child is going to be smart enough, or tall enough, or strong enough, or talented enough, to become ”anything” that child might want to become.
Let’s applaud those who know when to quit, when to give up and when to change direction, if it needs to be done.
There is no shame in being honest, with others or with yourself.
Further reading –